Introducing: Wicked Wednesday

Coaching & community support for wicked things.

Jan 24, 2025

What’s the most Wicked Thing on your to do list right now?

The one that feels so uncomfortable that you don’t even write it down on your list anymore. The one that you pretend you’ve forgotten about, but it’s lurking just beneath the surface. The one that makes your stomach turn when you think about it.

Yes, that one.

Are you feeling it? I know I do.

Hard things are easy and easy things are hard wicked.

Do you related to this statement?

Getting your financial documents in order ahead of tax season? Wicked.
Scheduling a dentist / vet / oil change appointment? Wicked.
Making a dreaded phone call? Wicked.
Listening to the voicemail? Wicked.
Filing last year’s expense report to get your money back? Wicked.

Your Wicked Thing doesn’t have to be big to be wicked; It also doesn’t have to be objectively hard to be wicked. If it feels wicked, it’s probably wicked.

Shame

If Wicked Things aren’t necessarily big or objectively hard, what do they have in common? Shame.

Shame is the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love, belonging, and connection.
—Brené Brown, Atlas of the Heart

If Brené Brown is right, then you might be having one of two thoughts right now:

I have no idea what that means and I don’t want to know.

I know exactly what that is and I don’t want to talk about it.

girl covering her face with both hands — Photo by Caleb Woods on Unsplash

Isn’t this so true?

The things is, though: that yucky ugh feeling you got when I asked you about your Wicked Thing? The one that you’re feeling right now (or pretending not to feel)? That’s shame right there.

Before I present you with the magical solution, Brené Brown and I want you to know this about shame:

We all have it. Shame is universal and one of the most primitive emotions that we experience. The only people who don’t experience it are those who lack the capacity for empathy and human connection.
We’re all afraid to talk about it. Sometimes we can feel shame when we just say the word “shame”. But it’s getting easier as more people are talking about it.
The less we talk about it, the more control it has over us. Shame hates being spoken.

Shame thrives on secrecy, silence, and judgment. Are you ready to take back some control? Here’s the good news:

The antidote to shame is empathy.

If we reach out and share our shame experience with someone who responds with empathy, shame goes away.

Shame needs you to believe that you’re alone. And I know that you are not alone.

That’s Why I’m Excited to Introduce: Wicked Wednesday

Wicked Wednesday is coaching and community support via Zoom and Substack Chat. Once a month, we get together on a Wicked Wednesday to name Wicked Things.

Together, We Can Do hard Wicked Things.

“Self-compassion also helps us move through shame, but we need empathy as well for an important reason: Shame is a social emotion. Shame happens between people and it heals between people.”
—Brené Brown, Atlas of the Heart

Wicked Wednesday is community support. Showing up for each other, being in a virtual room with fellow human beings who are brave enough to show up. Remember, shame is a universal experience; we all have it.

Wicked Wednesday is coaching - if you want to. I will shift between acting as a facilitator and as a coach. I’m available to listen and guide you through your Wicked Thing, and to hold space for your emotions. It’s an invitation, never a requirement for participation.

Here are ways you can participate:

Name a Wicked Thing. Share it, name it, and let that be enough.
Ask for Support. Practice asking for help even if you don’t exactly know yet what kind of help you need.
Show Empathy. React with empathy when others share their Wicked Thing. No pressure to bring your own.
Work on your Wicked Thing. Get to work on your Wicked Thing in a supportive space.
Celebrate your Progress. Remember that naming your Wicked Thing counts.

Logistics

Wicked Wednesday happens on the first Wednesday of every month on Zoom and via the Purposeful Connection Substack Chat. Here are the details:

Zoom

Please RSVP here: https://tidycal.com/hannakeiner/wicked-wednesday
When you RSVP, you can add the event to your calendar and I know who and how many people to expect.

What to expect: We will start with a gentle check in and then decide together how to best use our time together. I really want to be able to honor needs of the group and individuals in the moment. I recognize this might sound too open ended for some of you. I invite you to trust me to create that container with you. All you have to do is show up.

Substack Chat

On the first Wednesday of each month, I’ll start a new thread in the Purposeful Connection subscriber chat, inviting you to share your Wicked Thing, asking for support, and offering encouragement and support to others.

Please no unsolicited advice.

Sometimes, the best thing is just to be present with empathy.

I’ll join in throughout the day to offer my support.